Avada Kedavra

by Nuclear Bubble Wrap

Download MP3

Avada Kedavra Lyrics

Wormtail: Draco, at times like this, we Death Eaters say you must "Get Lord Voldemort's behind."

Voldemort: No. No. No.

Wormtail: Sorry my lord...

Voldemort: Amateur. It's "Get behind Lord Voldemort." Draco, a bad thing needs to happen, and it's up to you.

Draco: That's not what they teach us at Hogwarts.

Voldemort: Then maybe you need a new lesson! Avada Kedavra! What a wonderful curse.

Wormtail: Avada Kedavra! They don't get any worse.

Voldemort: It means no Harry, better call him a hearse...

Wormtail: Okay... he's a hearse!

Voldemort and Wormtail: Ha! It's our trouble-free, artillery...

Voldemort: Avada Kedavra!

Draco: Avada Kedavra?

Wormtail: Yeah. It's our favorite hex!

Draco: What's a hex?

Voldemort: Geez kid, what the hex wrong with you? Ha ha ha!

Wormtail: Ha ha ha! Good one, my lord. Draco, those two words will solve all your problems.

Voldemort: That's right. Take Wormtail here... Why, when he was a young Hogwarts (student)...

Wormtail: When I was a young Hogwarts (student).

Voldemort: Very nice.

Wormtail: Heh heh, thank you.

Voldemort: He found his persona lacked a certain appeal, he was teased and abused, till he squirmed and he squealed...

Wormtail: I'm a sensitive soul, and I was so chagrined, that they put me in Gryffindor, and not Slytherin, and oh, the shame!

Voldemort: He was ashamed!

Wormtail: Such a lame nickname!

Voldemort: Yeah, Wormtail's pretty lame.

Wormtail: And I wanted to quit...

Voldemort: How did ya feel?

Wormtail: Well, I felt like...

Voldemort: Hey! Wormy! Not in front of the kids!

Wormtail: Oh. Sorry.

Voldemort and Wormtail: Avada Kedavra! So nicely depraved! Avada Kedavra!

Voldemort: Even though you don't shave (yet).

Draco: It means no Harry, he'll go straight to the grave.

Voldemort: Yeah, sing it kid!

Voldemort and Draco: It's our recipe...

Wormtail: For anarchy...

All: Avada Kedavra!

Voldemort: Welcome to the dark side.

Draco: You're all killers?

Voldemort: We kill whoever we want.

Wormtail: Yup! Turn 'em into rump roasts!

Draco: That's beautiful!

Wormtail: That Order of the Phoenix makes me so mad!

Draco: I'm so angry I could kill a house-elf.

Voldemort: Heh... we don't need a house-elf killed... yet.

Draco: An owl?

Voldemort: Nuh-uh.

Draco: Harry Potter?!

Voldemort: No, he's mine! Listen, if you're going be a Death Eater, you have to act like a Death Eater. And there's one fella that REALLY needs to... go away.

Draco: Oooh, who's that?

Voldemort: A certain headmaster... who did you think?

Draco: Ohhhh.... Wow...

Voldemort: Oh yeah... I hope you're not chicken.

Wormtail: Unforgivable, yet satisfying!

Voldemort: This is a rare opportunity.

Wormtail: Mmm hmmm.

Voldemort: Mmmm... he'll die with a very pleasant crunch.

Wormtail: You'll learn to love it!

Voldemort: I'm tellin' you kid, this is the great life. No rules, no accountability... Oooh! The little muggle kind. And best of all... we're all pureblood!

Wormtail: Ahem...

Voldemort: That is, except me. Well, kid?

Draco: Oh well...

Wormtail: Hey! Don't point that at me!

Draco: Avada Kedavra!

Wormtail: Aaagh!

Draco: Unforgivable, yet satisfying.

Voldemort: That's it!

Draco and Voldemort: Avada Kedavra! Avada Kedavra! Avada Kedavra! Avada --

Draco: It means no Wormy, and Dumbledore's in his grave.

All: Love to hear them scream, in that flash of green...

Voldemort: Avada Kedavra!