Geezers and Foagies

by The Argyle Pimps

Geezers and Foagies Lyrics

Sinatra:

You're mean to me
Why must you be mean to me?
Gee, baby, it seems to me
You love to see me cryin'

Jamie:

Sit down and shut up
Shut your mouth (Gah)
Having some great conversation with the elderly
Discussing muffin mixes, this lady got pissed and yelled at me (I hate you)
I let her know that's really not the mood to exude
We can get into something heavy, I'm one bad dude
You don't know me foagie, I creep slowly from the back
Stop yellin', wedgie Melvin stretched up to your neck
It depends on my mood, it all depends
Some diaper humour, pun intended joke for your friends
Listen lady, you're gettin' sort of crazy tonight
After I feed you and clean, then we can take it to mics
And I'm 'a rip some vicious renditions, crackin' your bones
Take some calcium, I'm pouncing, you should've left me alone
Get the full treatment, defeated, blowin' you out
Shred to pieces like Cap'n Crunch does the roof of your mouth
What now? I'm blitzin' this senior citizen bold
Stop and stare, break your rockin' chair 'cause I'm cold

Chorus:

Foagies and geezers
Geezers and foagies
Sit down, eat your jell-o
It's better than being homeless
Foagies, geezers
Geezers, foagies
Murder She Wrote

Boney:

Me and Jamie, workin' at the rest home where your grammy stayed
Graveyard shift, baby, time for the panty raid
Anyways, I've been working here a while now
And my dad owns the place, so you know I can wil' out
Don't push me Ethel, just sit and eat your lunch
'Cause talkin' back on my shift gon' get a geezer punched
You think I'm playin' wi' chu? Sit your old butt down
And when your kids come around, don't let me catch no frowns
Don't let me, don't let me, don't let me catch no frowns
Check the name badge, granny, you're in my world now
It's 2am, I've got a baby wipe in my hand
I gotta use it on a naked 99 year old man
Before I gets done, he lets one 'cause he's nervous
Oh Sam, c'mon man, I know you did that on purpose
Laugh it up funny man, till it's time for the get back
I'll take your heart pills and replace them with Tic Tacs

Chorus:

Foagies and geezers
Geezers and foagies
Sit down, watch TV
It's better than being homeless
Quincy, Matlock
Benson, Golden Girls
Barnaby Jones

Jamie:

You old prune, let's play a game of bag tag
Me punching your saggy boobs while you get sad
You droopy old piece of used blubbery flab
It's a party of two; me and you, you old hag

Norma:

Please don't push me down in my nightgown

Jamie:

Well, how's an overnight trip to the balcony sound?

Norma:

Sounds cold, wet, damp and dank

Jamie:

Here's the form, Norma, you can file a complaint

Boney:

Yeah, we heard that little rumour that you spread to the staff
We all took it as humour, all we did was just laugh
You know, that craftmatic bed could prolly bend you in half
And I could just forget to even give you a bath
And I could just forget to even give you a bath
And I could just forget to even give you a bath

Jamie:

Yeah, funny, huh? Yeah, yeah.

Norma:

All I, all I wanted, all I wanted was my persimmon cookies.

Jamie:

Yeah, that's it, cookies. Yeah, that's what this is over, cookies.

Norma:

I just, I don't want...

Jamie:

Huh, how's it feel now?

Norma:

I don't wanna go in the closet. Oh! Aah!
This is a bunch of malarky!
Where's my persimmon cookies?
Wa-ah!
I'm cold.