July 31 2001 July in Review

[I stole this image and then modified it] Well, it's that time of the month :\ - the end. July has been a great month for this website. Though our video archive shrunk, our flash movie archive has grown. We also started updating almost every day! We also have some new site members: GooBeR Chikk, Princess_DarkRose, Coolz, and Mike (who is working on a new flash movie for the site). For the first time, every post has been saved. It will be kept for as long as possible in the July 2001 Archive. Of course, I know none of you come here for the posts. You come here for the flash movies and the images. So here are some more:
Hell
Booooobs!
Cookie Monster Music Video (Limp Bizkit fans will love this)
All your base Stop All Your Base

July 30 2001 Code Red Worm

[Code Red Worm] Well, well well. Looks like that e-mail worm I warned everyone about was serious. This is a global representation of the infected computers at Midnight, July 20, 2001. I hope none of you got the worm. It was created to attack whitehouse.gov 's I.P. address, and it partially succeeded.

Weeee Flash Movie (Back online)
Hell is a nice place to live, I hear.

Princess_DarkRose: Hi.
Albino Blacksheep: How were your drinks?
Princess_DarkRose: I dropped one of them cause I was laughing so hard at my sister. I'm going to drink that one tomorrow.
Albino Blacksheep: What was funny?
Princess_DarkRose: There was this girl that I used to babysit and she was all drunk and getting touchy touchy with my sister.
Albino Blacksheep: oooooh
Princess_DarkRose: Yeah. It was too damn funny. I just about died laughing.
Albino Blacksheep: Did your sister accept the touchyness?
Princess_DarkRose: She wasn't thrilled. The girl was all screaming and excited. LOL
Albino Blacksheep: Well, I guess you learnt a lot about that girl
Princess_DarkRose: Yep. A little alcohol makes her a little loose. LOL
Albino Blacksheep: So did you go to work today?
Princess_DarkRose: no?
Albino Blacksheep: oh. Was the question mark a typo?
Princess_DarkRose: Nope.
Albino Blacksheep: How can you answer a question with a question? How is "No?" even a question to that?
Princess_DarkRose: It's not a question so much as a tone of voice.
Albino Blacksheep: Oh, because it was weird that I asked. I know you've answered in that tone before
Princess_DarkRose: How is it weird that you asked?
Albino Blacksheep: Nevermind.
Princess_DarkRose: Done.
Albino Blacksheep: Finito.

July 30 2001 Are you normal?

Orb

So today I present you with THIS. It looks like a cheesy mind trick/test, but it's a good mind trick/test. Try it and follow the instructions just the way it says. Try it!
It's called: Are you normal or different? The test will tell you.

July 29 2001 Drinking and IMing

[Arthetic] Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

coolz53: hi]
AlbinoBlacksheep: hey V
coolz53: i'm drunk right how
coolz53: now i menat
coolz53: meant
AlbinoBlacksheep: I wish you were in Toronto last night with us.
coolz53: how vome
AlbinoBlacksheep: We drank.
coolz53: come i meangt
coolz53: cool
...
AlbinoBlacksheep: Did you go to a bar today?
coolz53: im going to one later on in the night
AlbinoBlacksheep: Which one?
coolz53: DANTES
coolz53: sorry i had caps on

July 28 2001 Homeless for a day

[AV of Princess_DarkRose] [AV of Sners] Barnyard Shananigans Special Edition

Princess_DarkRose and I had a great meal last night. She ordered baby squid and a swisss burger and had to take it home in a doggy bag. Since we were drinking with our meal too, we couldn't drive (we didn't bring a car with us anyways). The buses weren't running after 11:45pm. We ended up trying to sleep on some stairs at the nearby mall, but it was way too cold at night too sleep, and she was awake 30 hours at the time. Her eyes were bloodshot. I finally made it home by 8:00am. I don't know about her yet. I think she might have slept at the bus station. Anyways, she has some great files to post here on the main page, but we'll have to wait for her to make it home safely.

So here's bunnyavenger14's Jessica TheDoll Story:
AlbinoBlacksheep: you gonna write a Jessica story?
bunnyavenger14: ok
bunnyavenger14: ok
bunnyavenger14: i got it
bunnyavenger14: you wannaknow how i get good grades?
AlbinoBlacksheep: How?
bunnyavenger14: i pray to god for a dream with an octopus
bunnyavenger14: and the next day
bunnyavenger14: durng the test
bunnyavenger14: i see an octopus
bunnyavenger14: and he sez
bunnyavenger14: if you dont get the questions right
bunnyavenger14: sum1 will cut off my legs
bunnyavenger14: and sometims i argue with him
bunnyavenger14: no its abraham lincoln
bunnyavenger14: but i tell him i wont let anyone cut off his legs
bunnyavenger14: and that is how i get good grades

Remember - send in your own Jessica TheDoll Stories. Contact Send in sounds and pictures too to enhance your submissions.

July 27 2001 George Dublya Bush

[Breaking the sound barrier] The long awaited Xiaoxiao #4 Flash Movie

There is a chance that George Dublya (W.) Bush visited this site. 0.13% of Albino Blacksheep visitors access this site from a US Government Internet connection, and 0.22% from the US Military. What the hell are you doing here?
Click here perverts.
The prize-winning photo on the right, taken in the military, is what breaking the sound barrier looks like.

July 26 2001 E.T. phone home

Chat in a 3D scenario here

Albinoblacksheep.com is now in affliation of the DDRManix's Network. We now have a new MessageBoard that they provided for us. I like this board because becoming a member is fast. You don't even need to check your e-mail. There are already 16 members at this point.

July 26 2001 Driver's Licence

NEW FLASH MOVIE starring Cookie Monster

Driver had her licence until she ran into six cars

A teenager crashed into six cars Wednesday during the final manoeuvre of her driving test: parking.
She was set to get her licence, CFTO News reported, when she turned into the parking lot of the test centre.
But instead of parking, the driver accelerated and vehicle plowed into four parked cars.
Then it spun out of control and hit two more.
"She must have been in panic and hit the accelerator instead of the brake," witness Catherine Trainor told the TV station.
A pedestrian walking nearby was hospitalized with leg injuries after she was pinned between two cars.
The young woman behind the wheel received minor injuries.
The driving instructor was treated for shock and stress, and was sent home to recover.
Even though she had initially passed her test, the driver was given a failing mark after the crash.    - CP

- The Globe and Mail, Friday July 20, 2001

Princess_DarkRose thinks she should get her Motercycle licence. Hopefully, she will read this and change her mind

July 25 2001 User Submitted

[AV of Princess_DarkRose] This is Princess_DarkRose's submission for the Jessica TheDoll Story submissions:

There were some bunnies and they thought they were all tough and cool (they were guy bunnies) and they wanted to meet some girl bunnies cause they thought they were cute. they went to a bar and got pretty drunk cause they drank some beer and then they got silly and did some strange stuff that scared the girl bunnies away. The boy bunnies looked at each other but they were drunk and they said "vree vree vree" cause it was funny. then they started fighting each other for some other pretty girl bunnies that were there and one of the bunnies kicked the other bunny but then the roof came off the building and Gooberzilla took the bunnies and ate the pretty bunnies. the boy bunnies thought it was funny and went "vree vree vree" cause they were drunk and their teeth got in the way. Then Gooberzilla started to walk away and stepped on the drunk boy bunnies and they were flat and they all screamed Aaaaaahhhhhhh!!! Like little girls.

Ok bye.

Judges:

Well, it is certainly in the style of Jessica's first story - a classic indeed. Extra points for the bunnies saying "vree". The stepping on the bunnies is a proven success for an ending. However, this story lacks "Aaaaaaaaaaahs" and poor spelling. Also extra "vrees" would be a plus. Overall, this is an A- story.

Remember - send in your own Jessica TheDoll Stories. Contact Send in sounds and pictures too to enhance your submissions.

July 24 2001 GooBeR Chikk

[Goober] www.albinoblacksheep.com has a new member. Her name is GooBeR Chikk (her pic is on the left). Her creativity best be introduced by this story she wrote.

Click here for her story.

July 23 2001 Submissions

[GooBeR Chikk] Thanks to GooBeR Chikk for her avatar.

Now, I am urging regular visitors of this site to [Send Email] E-mail or UIN 106122255 ICQ your own Jessica TheDoll Stories. The task is to write in the exact same style as she does. If you do this successfully, you will be mentioned on this site or something else you want and you will hopefully be treated for brain damage. Good luck on your stories.

July 23 2001 E-mail Virus Alert

[Yo hablo Espanol] There is a worm that is currently spreading throughout e-mails. Not only will it infect your computer, but it will email all your contacts the same worm as well. The e-mail contains an attachment about 180-280 Kb in size. It can go by any name, but is easy to spot because it has two extentions. Most computers read this virus as an MS-DOS Shortcut. Please do not download a file with two extentions. This means something like .ZIP.PIF or similar. The e-mail's title will be something interesting like am-images or Burning MPEG3 TO CD USING NERO. The email is also in many languages including English and Spanish. If you do not read Spanish and you get a Spanish e-mail with an attachment, please delete it. The email's message most likely says this:

Hi! How are you?
I send you this file in order to have your advice
See you later. Thanks

July 19 2001 Stupid Couch

Sick of "All your base" by now? Click here

Yo, Log. I got your number on the call display, but I didn't have my phone with me. I was out. I would have had my phone with me, but I misplaced it. I wasn't sure where I put it, so I had to call myself on every floor listening for the ring. I knew it probably fell out of my pocket into the couch cussions, but I didn't think it would really be there because that's too stupid ...so I have my phone now.

Sick of "All your base" by now? Click here

July 19 2001 Pooping Moose

[Pooping Moose] I don't know why anyone would type "pooping moose" into a search engine, but I tried looking for a picture, then ended up having to take one myself. Oh no, original photos on a website! Basically, you press down on the moose, then its tail lifts and it poops brown jellybeans. It sounds simple, but just like pooping, it gets complex. The moose can poop all the jellybeans really fast, spilling them onto the floor; a poop can get stuck and then the moose is constipated and you have to push extra hard to get it out; you can run out of brown jellybeans and then a poop can be green or red; the poop can come out so hard that pieces of the moose fall off; the poop can get on your hands; you can run out of poop; some dog can come and eat all the poop; etc. The gift of a pooping moose was given to me by a very special lady, known on this site as, "Princess DarkRose". It's gifts like the pooping moose that actually make you think a little harder about the person who gave it to you.

July 17 2001 Oxford Dictionary

albino /'ael'bi:neu/ n. (pl. -s) 1 person or
animal lacking pigment in the skin and
hair (which are white), and the eyes
(usu. pink). 2 plant lacking normal col-
ouring.

black sheep n. colloq. member of a
family, group, etc. regarded as a dis-
grace or failure

- The Oxford Dictionary of Current English - Oxford University Press 1993

July 16 2001 1970s Webcam

Well, there was supposed to be a picture of a pooping moose jellybean despender to your left, but that will have to wait until tomorrow. After I finally got the webcam to display a picture (set to channel 3 and plugged the camera in), it was blurry and not even in colour. The pooping moose looked like it was part of the Blair Witch movie. You see, I don't own a webcam. Instead I use An RCA Newvicon, which was made sometime in the 70s. I was certain the camera was at the end of it's life and I was gonna have to save up for a real webcam. After hours of attempted photos of the pooping moose, I put the VCR on the floor, and suddenly, the picture was clear. I documented the whole thing, sorta.

Click here for more pictures and stuff of this incident

July 15 2001 Princess' Calendar.

[AV of Princess_DarkRose] Princess_DarkRose: Mine's [calendar] up at work for all to see. I have inappropriate things written on it to make people wonder about me.

Albino Blacksheep: What sorta things? Psyduck's birthday?

Princess_DarkRose:
April 14 - Set Lakeshore Rexall on fire,
May 21 - Raise Satan to do my bidding,
June 11 - Kill my boss and run off with his wife,
August 30 - take all the company's money and run run run and don't look back.

The only bad thing was that the store across the street really did catch on fire and there were the 7 tornados recently. LOL People wonder about me often. I have fun sometimes. They never know what to think besides that I'm the best worker there.


Albino Blacksheep: cooooool

Princess_DarkRose: I know. I think my last couple of weeks there, after I get my letter of reference, I'll dress in full goth attire and spray paint hexes into the carpet. :)

July 14 2001 AVs.

You either love or you hate these things. They are called AVs. Which one is your favourite?

We have reached about 40,000 unique page views in just 2 and a half months. Thank you visitors and affiliates.

July 11 2001 Vacation in Holland.

There are many reasons you should visit this site.
 1. It's a foreign site in English (rare).
 2. It's running to be the official site of Schoorl, Holland.
 3. In Holland many nice things are legal.
 4. It's run by some very beautiful young women.
If the site gets enough hits it will be the offical site of Schoorl, Holland. Their competitor for this honour is some [meanie] who doesn't respect these beautiful ladies so don't let him win. Please help www.schoorl.ws out.

July 10 2001 Vacation in Holland.

[AIM Chat]
My computer blew up. Buy me a new one.

July 9 2001 Interview with Susie

We at AlbinoBlacksheep.com were lucky enough to get an interview with Susie. We attampt to discover the psyche of Susie and what makes her tick, but simply asking is not as easy as it seems.

Albino Blacksheep: How did you discover that shade of pink?

Susie: I dont really recall. I just think it's the most God awful color on the face of the earth. I adore it. I call it 'Crackwhore Pink'.

Albino Blacksheep: Do you know any crackwhores?

Susie: Well, I used the alias [skinny little crackwhore] online for a while, so I guess I'd fall under that category. Somewhere between there, and whitetrash. Other than that, only my little sister, Katie, and a few girls I went to highschool with.

Albino Blacksheep: Are you finally off the crack?

Susie: Oh, yeah. Clean for three years, three months, and three days now.

Albino Blacksheep: I heard from a little bunny that it took you only one minute to lose your virginity.

Susie: Who is this allegedy bunny? And how do they know? Really, I dont recall. I was on crack at the time.

Albino Blacksheep: Well, apparently you know the bunny very "VERY" well.

Susie: [Stands out of her chair] I have no idea what you're talking about. I know no bunnies. Also, I've never met a bunny named Clyde. NEVER.

Albino Blacksheep: Clyde has proof. He even knows your cup size - C

Susie: What the f[*beep*]? How did you know that? Seriously. That's just odd.

Albino Blacksheep: I told you - from Clyde. When did you lose your virginity to Clyde?

Susie: [Finally sits back down] Like I said, I was on crack. My life was a blur back then...

Albino Blacksheep: Clyde told me you wouldn't want to answer that one. As far as you can remember when was the last time you bathed (not in alchohol)?

Susie: Actually, I take a shower a day, sometimes two.

Albino Blacksheep: Two because it's hot or two because you are one nasty dirty girl?

Susie: Can I opt for 'hot dirty girl?' After all, I am a pathological liar.

Albino Blacksheep: You got a pic to prove that?

Susie: Actually, I only took those sort of pictures once, as a joke, and sent them to a friend while he was at work. Just for a laugh, you know? Anyway, evidence has been destroyed.

Albino Blacksheep: Hold please. I just got an email from Clyde with some pictures attatched. Clyde wants me to take a look immediately

Susie: [points] Uh...Look! Over there!

Albino Blacksheep: If I look there then I can't check out the pictures.

Susie: Wow, I hadn't thought of that.

Albino Blacksheep: I guess these pictures can wait.

Susie: Well, if you insist.

Albino Blacksheep: Tell me about "the bar" incident.

Susie: The one in Cancun?

Albino Blacksheep: Okay, that one too.

Susie: Elaborate, please. I've had a few bar incidents...

Albino Blacksheep: "THE" bar incident

Susie: Hold on, I'm going to put them all in a hat and draw one.

Albino Blacksheep: Use the hat ypu didn't throw up in

Susie: Okay, well, I used to work at a bar in Panama City Beach, Florida, and there was this weird Charles Manson looking guy that frequented the bar. He always hot on me, and his girlfriend kept eyeing me like she was going to beat the hell out of me. Finally, I requested to be moved to the back of the bar to work, so I wouldnt have to deal with him. In any event, he kept following me, and they had to call the cops to get him to leave me alone. Before the cops got there, we went outback and, (How can I say this?) he..'had his way' with my car. I had to clean it off that night.

That's an honest to God true story.


Albino Blacksheep: Did the car concent to that?

Susie: She's not that type of car. She may look fast, but she's a real lady.

Albino Blacksheep: Was that the bar incident from last summer?

Susie: Actually yeah. Ironic that you should say that.

Albino Blacksheep: how come it's ironic?

Susie: Er. Because you couldn't possibly have any idea when that had taken place?

Albino Blacksheep: Clyde and I talk a lot.

Susie: I know nothing of this Clyde! I don't!

Albino Blacksheep: So you know nothing of Carl?

Susie: HIS NAME IS CLYDE NOT CARL!!!

Albino Blacksheep: Okay, let's forget about all your many many many bunny lovers. That's in the past.

Susie: Indeed. This is a whole new week.

Albino Blacksheep: What would you like to talk about instead?

Susie: Well, that's your call. You're conducting the intverview.

Albino Blacksheep: Well we can't talk about your sexlife. We haven't got all day.

Susie: [Coming onto Albino Blacksheep] Clever, clever man!

Albino Blacksheep: [Leaves interview and waits until Susie reaches climax before continuing the interview]

Albino Blacksheep: Sorry, I was disconnected. You like cleverness?

Susie: Who doesn't?

Albino Blacksheep: You don't seem like the type of girl that's into brains.

Susie: Yeah, I'm more into money.

Albino Blacksheep: and the clever bunnies get the good jobs to bring in more carrots. Am I right? vree vre vre

Susie: Uh...huh! Vree!

Albino Blacksheep: Why did you make your website?

Susie: Spreading the joys of crackwhore pink and sarcasm to the world, I guess.

Albino Blacksheep: When did you make it?

Susie: Late 1999, I think, though it was a collaboration. It was me, and another author. I claim 'creative differences.'

Albino Blacksheep: Who was the other author?

Susie: My sister, Katie. Actually, it's very hush hush, but we might join forces again!

Albino Blacksheep: I think you two should. It would be 4 times the fun.

Susie: Indeed! The mathematical genius in me had already devised those same figures! How odd!

Albino Blacksheep: Still a C average?

Susie: Yeah. Damn.

Albino Blacksheep: That's just perfect for many people.

Susie: [Pretending she doesn't have a dirty mind] Well, yeah, I guess. It wasn't according to my teachers, though.

Albino Blacksheep: Especially Clyde.

Susie: Indeed.

Albino Blacksheep: what did your teachers tell you?

Susie: Usually to wake up, but mostly, "get out from under that boy's desk young lady!" But, that was back in Juniour High.

Albino Blacksheep: What are you doing right now?

Susie: Actually, downloading songs.

Albino Blacksheep: Which one?

Susie: Well, I just got some Joan Jett, Blondie, and now I'm getting Save Ferris. I'm going to marry Monique one day.

Albino Blacksheep: Aren't downloading songs illegal?

Susie: No.

Albino Blacksheep: Don't you think you got into enough trouble with the law already?

Susie: Haha. Funny you should mention that.

Albino Blacksheep: Tell me..

Susie: No.

Albino Blacksheep: Or, I'll ask Clyde for his version.

Susie: Haha. Do that.

Albino Blacksheep: He said you got caught with fake I.D.

Susie: But, I'm twenty-one.

Albino Blacksheep: Before..

Susie: Im not sure I follow.

Albino Blacksheep: [Trying to get to the good stuff] Nevermind. You obviously have nothing interesting to hide.

Susie: Sorry. I could go commit a crime. I'm about to go to the gas station anyway.

Albino Blacksheep: For your one phone call, call here to complete the interview.

Susie: Okay, but you'll have to send the bail, too.

Albino Blacksheep: [Begins to open picture email attachments] Bye.

Susie: Nightnight.

Albino Blacksheep: [Looks at e-mail] OHHHH MYYY GODDDDDD!!!

July 4 2001 House These Hoes

[Test]          Bored? ICQ Sue! 120129740
       Bored? ICQ Sue! 120129740
     Bored? ICQ Sue! 120129740
   Bored? ICQ Sue! 120129740
 Bored? ICQ Sue! 120129740

Susie and her friends are looking for a new place to live. Their lease is up. They are looking to move into a safe neighbourhood, but for a very low cost in Montgomery, Alabama.

Please support the House These Hoes (HTH) Project.

 

« June 2001 | July 2001 | August 2001 »